Habits That Have To Go Right Now

Over thinking. I did it a lot in my teens and early twenties. I do not need to get back into it.

Rushing to wash my dishes before work.

Buying snack foods we like just because they are on sale.

Waiting around to see if someone will join me for an activity.

Overly planning out meals for the week, it is nice to get out once or twice a week or just eat something basic.

Worrying about the status of my fertility.

Daydreaming, its a serious time sink.

Getting snippy with my partner because he got snippy with me due to the stress he’s been under. It just does not help the relationship to reciprocate in that way.

I evaluate my habits regularly. My goals in life are generally surround by being happy and a decent human being. However, I know that I can pick up little motions here and there that can hinder achieving or maintaining my goals. I think I am going to be more open about my goals again next week because I feel like it has been too long since I really thought about them. My recent journal reading and writing has me rethinking some changes I made in my late twenties. Its time to dive deeper into my long term goals.

 

 

Learning to Deal With Failures

This will be a short one as I had a rough week and honestly can not pin down what I feel like writing about.

Through my partner’s work we have access to a website called mequilibrium and it has brought up a lot of feelings for me. The website is meant to help you mentally by providing “science-based resilience training.” The most recent track has me reflecting on my failures and how I may not have handled them well. I now have a better picture of what to do in the future, but I can not help feeling overwhelmed by those failures. I am not depressed, but bewildered.

I do not even know what to say about my failures. Life moved on though and things worked out. Then yesterday, I saw a high school friend posted that she was recently let go from her job and in the same post she was so gracious about the opportunity she was given. Then she announced her next move. I hope I can be that strong when met with my next failure.

24 Hour Policy

This topic applies to a lot of things in life. Everyone should really consider taking a day to calm themselves, clear their heads and then respond. Just like everything, it is a practice. So take a deep breathe, listen and do your best.

My colleague was the one who actually said the term 24 hour policy to me. You receive an email or have a disagreement that brings up a lot of emotion and you break away to allow that to cool down before you respond, by giving it 24 hours. Or maybe you are someone who says to sleep on it.

I have been thinking about this concept a lot lately and seeing how much it can be applied. My museum career has much to do with customer service. In customer service, you see the best and the worst in people, and unfortunately more often the latter. It is important to practice listening, patience and thoughtfulness. You can not lose your cool, even it you get the sense that the person is not being logical and making you feel attacked.

I also have been trying to use this more in my relationship. Things lately are tough, he feels a lot of pressure with work and with ADHD he hyper focuses on it. We have argued a fair amount over the last 3 weeks, but I am trying to sleep on things before bringing them up again. I asked him to do the same and we are going to sit and chat today about how to relieve the tension we have been feeling recently.

I feel like it has more to do with not feeling loved because of time not spent on the relationship. It is not just him not being too busy, but also me neglecting to just ask for him to please sit at the dinner table with me. I need to ask for help and attention more, but it is a little scary to open yourself up like that sometimes.

What would you do with a 24 hour policy in your life?

Journaling

I was gifted a journal when I graduated from high school. I started writing in it when I first moved away for college and only remember to write in it now on a rare occasion. It contains a lot of my personal thoughts and surprisingly has no lock on it. I have only shown it to one person. After that I decided to keep it to myself, although I do not really hide it either. Just trust.

I was recently reminded of it by my coworker, she mentioned how she wrote in a journal everyday throughout high school until about 5 years ago. I had not written in it since March 2018… oof. So I added a new, very long entry and looked through the previous pages. Remembering some events and feelings made me smile, all the dating and hook up drama made me roll my eyes and a few thoughts made me cringe that I ever thought that way. I thought I was so grown up and yet I really was not.

It is an opportunity, as I see many things, to realize who I am and reconsider some goals. For instance, I feel like I should not cringe because that was me then. I developed from those mistakes, feelings and experiences. I wonder if I am just more laid back now. I certainly think differently. Of course, I have been in the same relationship for a decade now. Cheers to less drama in that arena.

I did have trouble deciding what to journal about now. I have this blog as a writing outlet, but what do I write to myself or no one. I also thought about what to do with the journal when I am done. If I hold on to it, someone would read it. Is that bad? Do I want to burn it to keep it private?

I think I made research a bit about journaling, maybe I can find a way to do it that will provide something more to life. Of course, if you, my reader, journal I would love to hear about your topics or style.

Burt’s Bees Renewal Line Review

When I was younger I had no clue what to do with my skin and how important it was to take care of it. My best friend’s mom had her following a routine probably well before I knew her. From that experience I had a clue that I should be doing more than I was, which was nothing, but I had no clue where to start. I just left my skin be and only cleansed it in the shower with whatever we had. That did not really change much, other than I did make the effort to remove makeup.

In graduate school, however, I met a friend’s wife who was a resident dermatologist at the time. It did not take long before someone asked her a skin related question and her only response was, “I’m off duty ladies, but the advice I give everyone wanting to have beautiful skin for life… wear sunscreen everyday all over, at the very least SPF 30 on your face, neck and chest, and develop a skincare routine.” She then changed the subject and no one asked her about her work ever again.

It was only then, that I finally started trying. I went to Target the next day to look at skincare. It was an overwhelming and horrifying experience with all the moisturizers, toners, cleansers, serums, etc. to choose from. I found a sunscreen and a daily facial cleanser that I felt suited my needs and called it a day after nearly 2 hours of reading product labels and listening in to what folks were saying in the aisle.

It took 3 more years before I got into a routine of cleansing, protecting and moisturizing both in the morning and at night. At first I focused a lot on the face, neck and chest region when it came to protecting from the Sun. Of course after having skin removed that my doctor was concerned over, that changed to all of my skin.

Since moving to New York state a year ago, I have been using most of the Burt’s Bees Renewal line and I really like what I am seeing and feeling.

• I have a lot less acne. Mostly just hormonal acne is what I am seeing now.
• My under eye skin is brighter.
• I see my skin getting plumper and smoother.
• My skin stopped getting dried out over the night.

I have the face wash, daily lotion with SPF, eye cream and night cream. I use them according to the instructions and I do not have any negative feedback about the products. The only things I use in addition to these is castor oil on my brows in hopes they will grow and the Trader Joe’s face mask maybe once a month.

Overall, I do not spend much time on my face thanks to these products, therefore in my opinion they are quality products and so affordable compared to what many ladies are spending at the makeup counter in Macy’s or Dillards. I prefer to just have the morning and evening routine which are between 5-10 min.

Have you tried them? Any products you recommend?